


劍舞

by drivingsideways



Series: A Pair of Swallows [7]
Category: Serenade of Peaceful Joy (TV), 孤城闭 | Held in the Lonely Castle (TV)
Genre: A little bit of angst, Episode Related, F/M, Romance, because who am i without it, but mostly it's sweet, spoilers upto episode 64
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-19
Updated: 2020-05-19
Packaged: 2021-03-03 00:41:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,352
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24266056
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/drivingsideways/pseuds/drivingsideways
Summary: In the high trees—many doleful winds:The ocean waters—lashed into waves.If the sharp sword be not in your hand,How can you hope your friends will remain many?Do you not see that sparrow on the fence?Seeing the hawk it casts itself into the snare.The fowler to catch the sparrow is delighted:The Young Man to see the sparrow is grieved.He takes his sword and cuts through the netting:The yellow sparrow flies away, away.Away, away, up to the blue skyAnd down again to thank the Young Man.- "The Liberator"/ Wu-Ti, Emperor of Liang , translated by Arthur Waley
Relationships: Cáo Dānshū | Empress Cao (1016-1079 CE)/Zhāng Màozé
Series: A Pair of Swallows [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1726612
Comments: 8
Kudos: 8





	劍舞

**Author's Note:**

> \- In the drama time line, this is sometime during the events of Episode 64.  
> \- I've used the title "Lady Gao" for Gao Taotao, but I'm not sure if this is an accurate title for her. If anyone has a better suggestion, please let me know, I'll update it!

When he is announced into the hall, the Empress pokes her head out from behind a drape that hides the entrance to an inner chamber. As he bows to her in greeting, she places a finger across her lips to indicate that he should be quiet and disappears again.

She seems to be playing a rather energetic game of hide and seek with little Zhao Zhongzhen. The little boy is currently looking beneath one of the couches placed in the hall, getting on all fours to check for his disappearing grand aunt.

Taotao _guniang_ \- no, he must learn to think of her as Lady Gao – sits by sipping her tea leisurely, looking on with an indulgent smile.

He bows to her and she gives him a warm smile.

“Sir Zhang!” she says, “It’s very good to see you again. It has been too long!”

“My lady honours me” he says, bowing formally once more. “I’m indeed fortunate to meet you once more”.

Zhao Zhongzhen makes an exasperated sound and waddles off in the opposite direction, when he realizes his quarry isn’t under the couch.

Maoze ducks his head to hide his smile but can’t help his eyes being drawn to the silhouette he can make out behind the drapes. It’s not as though he’s unaware of the Empress’ playful side, it’s just that it’s been too long since he’d seen it.

“How is _guanjia’s_ health today?” Lady Gao’s voice draws his attention back to her. Her gaze on him is bright, though even as he watches, it changes into something less openly assessing, like a curtain being drawn across a window. She had yet some things to learn from her aunt, it seemed; _niangniang’s_ face seldom, if ever, gave a clue to what she was thinking.

 _Not if you know what to look for,_ a voice whispers in his head.

It sounds slightly smug.

“Guanjia is in good health and spirits today” he lies, smoothly. “The warm weather these last few days is doing wonders”.

Maoze doesn’t know just exactly how much Lady Gao is aware of what has been happening at the palace- or how much _niangniang_ would want him to reveal. But discretion is always better than its opposite, he’s found. And if Lady Gao is anything like her aunt, then she will surely appreciate that.

“I’m very relieved to here that” she says, “The 13th Commander will also be glad to hear it, Sir Zhang. He worries that _guanjia_ doesn’t get the rest he needs, shouldering the burden of the world as he does”.

Before he can think of a suitably noncommittal reply to _that,_ she suddenly changes course.

“Have you heard from your former students at Kaimeng Academy lately? Surely they must miss their favourite Sir Zhang!”

At his obvious surprise, she says, smiling, “ _Niangniang_ has sometimes read to me Aunt Du's wonderful letters. I feel I know all your students by name, even!”

“It’s been some months since I last heard from them” he says, “Though that is not surprising, since the winter closes up the roads from Beizhou to the capital”.

Delighted laughter makes them both look away- apparently, the game has come to a satisfactory end, now that Zhongzhen is hoisted onto his grand aunt’s hip, and she’s feeding him a sweet candy in reward, as she walks toward them.

It’s so rare to see her so cheerful these days, that he forgets to be _careful,_ and lets himself drink his fill of her smiling face.

Zhao Zhongzhen puts his sticky hand on her cheek and rubs it, making Lady Gao gasp out loud.

“Oh you naughty child! Niangniang, let me take him…”

He’s already offering her a cloth taken from his sleeve before he realizes what he’s doing and feels his face heat at the surprise on her face.

Of all the _stupid_ things to do in full view of the world-

His glance darts to Lady Gao, but all her attention, mercifully, is on the child.

“Thank you, Sir Zhang”

The cloth is whisked out of his hand, and she dabs at her face, smiling at him reassuringly.

“Won’t you join us for some tea?”

She nods at Xia’er who quickly fetches a cup for him and sets it on the table.

He bows, accepting her offer, and takes a seat opposite Lady Gao, to niangniang’s left.

Zhongzhen reaches out for one of the sweet pastries on the table.

Lady Gao slaps his hand away.

“You’ll make yourself sick today, A-Zhen” she scolds. “No more sweets for you!”

“Oh, let him have one more!”

Niangniang’s tone is gently admonishing.

“I can’t believe how you spoil him, niangniang” Lady Gao grouses, as she moves the plate out of his reach. “I remember how strict you were with us as children!”

“Ah, it’s a grandmother’s job to spoil her grandchildren….and besides”, she adds, chuckling, as Lady Gao makes a face at her, “It has the added advantage of annoying you!”

“Niangniang!” protests Lady Gao. “How unfair!”

“Very!” she agrees, as she plucks a pastry from the plate and reaches over to feed Zhongzhen, who munches at his gift happily, getting crumbs all over his face.

Lady Gao sighs.

“Sir Zhang were any of _your_ students this much trouble?” she asks.

“Frequently more” he answers, with a small smile. “Though such fine pastries were not often available, there’s a locally made candy that’s very popular among the children. They would stuff it in their sleeves and pass it along to each other during the lesson. And then sooner or later, the recitation would be interrupted by the sound of a dozen students sucking loudly on the candy! Once they did it in Sir Fan’s class, even!”

“He must have been so angry!” Lady Gao exclaims.

“Only because they didn’t offer _him_ any!” Maoze responds, smiling at the memory. “They were then made to copy the rules of courtesy fifty times each- while he sat there, eating the remaining candy in front of their very eyes!”

Niangniang laughs, and Lady Gao joins in.

“His punishments were always like that” Niangniang reminisces, “Though I don’t recall any incident involving sweets with us. It was more with the jars of wine that my classmates would sneak in!”

“Did _you_ ever do that?” Lady Gao exclaims, amazed.

Niangniang grimaces.

“It was the cheapest wine they could find from the nearest village. I was quite sure I’d _die_ if I had to drink it! Not that anyone was offering! So no….but that’s also when I decided I would learn to brew it myself!”

“I remember guanjia is very fond of the wine brewed here in Kunning Hall”

“Why yes…” Niangniang’s smile doesn’t change. “Though these days, the physicians have him on a very strict diet, so sadly, he doesn’t have the chance to taste it as much…”.

Zhongzhen provides a distraction by throwing the remnants of his pastry on the floor.

One of the maids runs up to clean up the mess.

“Oh you!” Lady Gao scolds. “That’s really enough for the day. I’m taking you home right now!”

She turns to her aunt.

“Niangniang” she says, sounding a little plaintive. “Next time I’m going to leave him with his other grandmother before I visit you!”

Niangniang gives her a fond smile and reaches out to squeeze her arm.

“Yes, do that” she says.

As Lady Gao rises, she adds, “And don’t forget to tell Zongshi that I appreciate the book he sent for me!”

“I won’t, niangniang” Lady Gao promises, and then adds with a smile, “Not that he would let me forget it. His first question is certainly going to be what you thought of it!”

“I’ll be sure to write him a message about it after I’ve finished it”

Lady Gao curtseys to her, and Maoze rises so he can bow in farewell to her.

“I hope to see you again soon, Sir Zhang” Lady Gao says, smiling warmly at him. “My husband will also be thrilled to know that I met you. He’s also very impressed with what you’ve accomplished in Beizhou”.

“I thank 13th Commander for his courtesy” Maoze replies, bowing once more. “And I’m honoured by my lady’s kind words”.

Lady Gao exits with Zhongzhen clinging to her hand.

After she leaves, they sip their tea in silence for a while.

Maoze doesn’t mind the quiet- they have time.

These days, he’s made sure he comes by every day- ostensibly to report on guanjia’s health, but sometimes on other pretexts.

He’s sure guanjia knows too- but perhaps he had been genuinely ashamed of his accusations then, or- and this was more likely, Maoze acknowledged- guanjia now realized that with his health failing, he needed the Empress more than ever, to steady the boat should something happen to him; whatever the reason, guanjia had not questioned either of them about it.

And when he visits like this- her staff have learnt to leave them alone.

“What do you think of Taotao?” she asks suddenly, breaking the companionable silence.

“I think you trust her” he says, with a small smile in her direction.

“She’s always been sensible” Danshu replies, “Steady as a rock, and mature beyond her years”.

“Like her aunt” he murmurs.

She gives him a look.

“The flattery is really unnecessary, Pingfu”.

“On the contrary”

“Drink your tea” she says, mock severely, while her lips turn up at the corner. “And tell me how guanjia is today”.

He hesitates.

What he’s going to report will probably anger her.

“Miao Shufei sought an audience today with guanjia” he says, quietly. “Along with Superintendent Ren”.

The half-smile is wiped off her face instantly.

“And?”

“Superintendent Ren said that Princess Consort has asked to be transferred out of the capital and is willing to accept a demotion as punishment”.

She raises an eyebrow.

“Superintendent Ren?” she murmurs. “This is not like him”.

“He’s very fond of the Princess” he reminds her, “Besides, Miao Shufei- she grew up here in the palace, and Empress Dowager was very fond of her too. Superintendent Ren and she have a long history…”

She nods, accepting his reasoning.

“I don’t suppose guanjia agreed” she says, after a minute. “There is absolutely no way it would be accepted in the Court”.

“No” agrees Maoze.

He doesn’t want to repeat the rest of the terrible things that guanjia had said.

She gives him a sharp look.

“Pingfu”

There’s iron in that quiet voice.

“He told Miao shufei that Li Wei and his mother had done no wrong” he admits. “That Princess was in the wrong for not agreeing to the consummation of the marriage”.

Her hand clenches around the tea-cup, and she sets it down, but doesn’t release her hold.

He rests the tips of his fingers against her whitened knuckles.

“That was incredibly _stupid_ of He’er” is all she says.

“Niangniang” he says, softly.

She gets up abruptly, and he jumps to his feet.

“It’s been a while since I’ve done some sword practice” she says, “I’ve been meaning to ask you to spar with me”.

“Now?”

“It's as good a time as any”.

“I’m out of practice”.

“So am I”.

As they walk to the clearing in the woods, she asks, “How is Huaiji?”

He glances at her sideways- the late afternoon light glints off the gold of her armour.

It’s not the heavy armour that she had practiced in that first time- the one she had gifted to guanjia all those years ago. This is one more suited to her size.

Her hand grasps her sword hilt firmly as they trample the grass.

She’s dispensed with any staff.

He can’t deny that there’s a kernel of fear still within him, when he contemplates their increasing recklessness.

He knows how easily it can all be taken away from him again, how his entire life could be crushed like a golden sandfly beneath a boot.

But she was clearly not in the mood to listen to him.

He wonders whether her newfound confidence is rooted in knowledge or it’s just that she’s grown too weary to care.

“As you might imagine” he replies. “He’s a quiet child, has always been. And now, even more than before, he doesn’t dare to speak”.

She nods.

“Make sure he’s eating enough” she instructs.

“I am” he reassures her.

“And that he won’t do anything- rash”

“He has more self-control than me”

She stops abruptly and turns to him, but says nothing, though her eyes burn into his.

Then she turns back and starts walking again.

“Calm your mind” he murmurs, “Or else you’re going to get hurt”.

“Will I?” she murmurs, the grass, taller now, swishing against her boots. “Let’s see”.

The sky is on fire, by the time they reach the clearing with the flattened grass.

In silence, they each start with the motions of the _jianwu_ , side by side, in perfect step.

Maoze feels the stretch and burn of his muscles, being put into use after a long time.

The weight of the sword feels both familiar and not.

He empties his mind of all other thoughts and draws his focus inward.

It’s almost like waking up from a dream when he suddenly hears her say, “Ready?”

He realizes then that he’d closed his eyes.

When he opens them, she’s standing three feet away, a tiny uptick to the corner of her mouth.

He nods.

The clash and scrape of metal is loud, though the chorus of the evening insects provides a chittering accompaniment.

Just like the last time they had done this, she attacks aggressively.

He parries, letting his body bend and swerve and sway like a reed in the water.

“Fight me” she hisses as she forces him backward in three quick steps, “Pingfu”.

His back hits a tree.

She takes three steps back, swinging her sword with a slow circular motion of her wrist.

Behind her, the sun is setting in a blaze of glory, and her eyes glitter in her shadowed face.

She’s panting, as is he, breath coming in short gasps.

Strands of her hair fly loose around her face, untethered from the pins.

There’s a bead of sweat rolling down her temple.

His eyes are drawn to it, helpless.

Suddenly, she lifts her sword and rushes forward.

He hears the whisper of the blade as it brushes past his ear to bury itself in the trunk behind him.

He slides away, drawing her back out, and she huffs a laugh, yanking out the sword. 

He keeps his eyes on hers as he walks backward slowly, sword clasped firmly in front of him.

She walks slowly forward, sword trailing next to her, almost loosely held.

Suddenly she’s rushing forward, and instead of falling further back, he charges forward too.

This time the clash of their swords draws sparks.

He has no time to think about it- both of them now attacking, furious, heavy strokes.

He can feel his arm begin to tire, and his legs are on fire.

His inner robes cling to his skin, completely soaked through.

Fireflies appear, as the darkness deepens, winking in and out.

She’s merely a silhouette now, only the faint glimmer of her armour giving her away.

The moon rises in the west, and the faint wisp of a breeze starts up.

A bead of sweat falls into his eye and he blinks.

That’s all it takes- once again, he finds himself pressed back against a tree trunk, only this time she’s pressed up against him, her entire weight on him.

The tip of her sword presses into the junction of his neck, cold and dangerous. 

Her panting breaths mingle with his.

His sword clatters to the ground, and he rests his head against the trunk, with a small thump.

She bows her head to rest on his shoulder, and the pressure at his neck is suddenly gone.

He hears her sword fall too.

Her armour pokes into him at odd places- into the jut of his shoulder, the crease of his hip.

He wonders if she can feel the wild thump of his heart through her armour.

Her breath comes in small puffs against his collar.

“Why won’t they trust me?” she says, at last.

She means He’er and Huirou.

“They don’t know you’re on their side” he says, as his breath eases.

“Don’t they know I _love_ them?”

“They know you’ve devoted your whole life to being the perfect Empress” he reminds her, “that you’ve sacrificed a great deal for that”.

“They won’t listen to me” she says, after a minute, very quietly, almost a whisper. “Especially Huirou”.

“She will”, he says gently, bending his h ead toward her. “But you have to trust her too”.

She moves so that crown of her head brushes his jaw.

Her silence feels like a question.

“Show her who you really are, Cao Danshu” he answers into the shell of her ear.

He feels the trembling shudder that goes through her at that.

He doesn’t move, just letting her rest like that against him.

In the clearing the fireflies are putting on a display to rival the fireworks at new year’s.

 _I could die now,_ Maoze thinks, _and my life wouldn’t have been in vain, for I have experienced one perfect moment._

He hears her give a tiny sigh and feels the tautness leaves the body pressed against his, even through the layers of clothes and armour.

‘Pingfu”.

“Mm?”

She lifts her head, lips grazing against his jaw, as one hand comes to cradle the side of his head, a gentle pressure turning it more fully toward her.

His lips find her cheekbone first, just under the corner of her eye, and then travels slowly lower, a soft trail.

She sighs, and her breath is warm against his lips, and then they’re kissing.

He’s imagined it so many times, over long lonely nights and days, at times ashamed of his fantasies, at times too weary to care for shame.

He’s kissed her in sunshine, and rain, under the safe dark of a quilt, in a garden riotous with flowers, snowflakes on their lashes, and under the stars.

There’s a strange melding of fantasy and reality now, like layers of thin parchment over each other, their soft touches blurring like strokes of dark ink over each other.

A finger caresses at the delicate skin beneath his ear, and he shivers, and his mouth parts, involuntarily.

She licks at his lips, and he opens for her, welcoming her possession.

The world around them fades into nothingness. There is nothing but her, the press of her body into his, the earthy smell of her, and the warm taste of her- tea and the mixed sweet and sour tartness of plum. There’s only the firmness of her fingertips against his jaw, and the silk of her hair in his hand- when had he moved that to cradle her head-

The break apart for air, and then come together again and again, and he had been totally wrong- _this_ was the perfect moment- this moment- his lips swollen and tingling, forehead warm where she rests against him, and the softened curve of her spine against his palm. Her palm slips down and comes to rest between them against his chest, pressed flat right over his heart.

He strokes her nape and she melts into him even further, tucking her head beneath his chin.

If he’d been one of her worms, he’d weave them now into the cocoon of this moment, to never emerge.

But the moon is high in the sky already.

“What are you thinking?” she whispers.

He smiles into her hair.

“That I’m glad I never have to _really_ fight you”.

She makes a huffing sound, and shuffles on her feet, but he can make out she’s secretly pleased, by the way her smile curves into his throat.

The insects have gone silent.

An owl hoots, and a lazy cloud drifts across the moon.

His thumb stokes gently at that soft vulnerable spot at her nape, and he smiles again into her hair.

“Ready?”

**Author's Note:**

> \- Title translates to "Sword Dance". Yes, I know, obvious, but I honestly suck at titles! 
> 
> Kudos/comments are love and food for a hungry writer! :D


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